Journey to Faith

Journey to Faith
Follow your own path

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

How to Have More Peace & Less Drama Part 1

Is your life full of drama? One crisis after another? Constantly on the run? Perhaps you've become accustomed to this type of existence. Let me assure you - this is not the way God intended for us to live. If you want more peace and harmony and less drama and chaos in your life, then read on.

First why do we allow all this in our lives? Speaking from personal experience, it is because that is what we grew up with. I had an alcoholic father who could never hold a job. My parents argued constantly and we never had peace in the home. I learned anxiety and conflict was the norm. Then I married a man who was controlling and emotionally and verbally abusive, kind of like my father - again anxiety and conflict. We tend to perpetuate that with which we are familiar. Perhaps you can relate.

So this past weekend, I attended a wake for a friend of a friend. I went for emotional support more than anything. I had never been to a wake so was not sure what to expect. It turned out to be a gathering of family and friends to break bread, reminisce, and console one another. All was going relatively well until the ex-wife of the deceased launched into a litany of the baggage her suddenly-deceased ex-husband had left her with. As I imagined what the coming months would hold for her, it brought back old memories of my divorce and the mess my ex had left me to contend with years ago. I had to walk away.

I'm sure you've heard similar stories. So why does this happen? You may already know the answer. Much of the stress, drama, and conflict that comes into our lives is a result of people not taking responsibility for themselves. I've often said "There are two types of people in this world: those who shirk responsibility and those who take on too much." Those who fall into the first category typically have addictive personalities or have a victim mentality. Those who fall into the second category are typically codependent people-pleasers. Sadly, these two personalities tend to attract each other. So what to do?

If you fall into the first category, it's time to take a look within. Now this may sound a bit harsh, but it's time to GROW UP! Now I am all for having fun and enjoying life, but partying and socializing till the wee hours of the morning is fine when you're in your teens and twenties. By the time you hit your thirties, it's time to balance out the equation by taking on more responsibility for your own life. As Stephen R. Covey, author of the book "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" says, it's time to put first things first.

If you want less drama and stress in your life, here are 6 steps you can take to make your life more harmonious and peaceful.

1. Get a decent job.

2. Pay your bills on time.

3. Stop depending on other people to bail you out.

4. Make commitments.

5. Deal with your hurts and insecurities.

6. Ask God to heal you.

I know this sounds like tough love and it is. But sometimes we need to hear truth as tough as it may be to swallow. If you're in the second category and take on too much responsibility, stay tuned for next week's post when I'll share the steps you can take to stop your drama as well.

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If you found this post helpful, share it with a friend and post a comment. Until next time, keep looking up