Journey to Faith

Journey to Faith
Follow your own path

Thursday, October 13, 2016

How to Make a Huge Difference in Your Relationships

If you could do one thing that would improve the quality of your relationships in a big way, would you do it? Different people feel and experience love differently. In this series, I'm sharing on the five love languages as described by best selling author, Dr. Gary Chapman.

According to Dr. Chapman, there are five main ways people experience being loved. Today, I'm going to share with you the second love language and how it can make a huge difference in your relationships.

Psychologist William James says that one of the deepest human needs is to feel appreciated. The second love language is words of affirmation. Many people experience love through positive words. These include but are not limited to: praise, encouragement, compliments, approval, and appreciation.

Yet somehow, the human tendency is to be critical and demeaning. People often get a kick out of making fun of others. Have a listen to the comics on television and on stage. One reason could be that they are insecure and they feel better about themselves when they make someone else feel smaller. This may be funny to some, but in real life no one wants to be put down. Negative comments can cause wounds that may take many years to heal.

The tongue is a powerful ally that can work for or against us. It is easy in the heat of the moment to blurt out a harsh or critical comment, yet there is a high price to pay. Practicing self-control when speaking is a skill we would all do well to master. The apostle James exhorts us to "Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry" ( James 1:19).

 So why not start practicing using more positive words in your relationships today? Relationships are imperfect at best and some are smoother than others but there is always room for improvement. If someone you love is distant or cold and you don't understand why, try using more words of affirmation and see if you get different results.

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Until next time, keep looking up!