6 Easy Ways to Get Your Joy Back - Part 2

What's going on in your life these days? Seems like everybody has battles they are fighting and they seem to be increasing. If you're feeling down about yours, try listening to someone else's. So! Let's talk about the next 3 tips to keeping our joy, shall we?

How high is your joy meter today? High, low, or medium? Things can happen in a minute that can steal our joy, which is where mindfulness and faith come in. It's a question of being aware of when something irritates us and then making a mindful decision whether we are going to let it get to us. 

Joy flows in and through us on a daily basis but we must make a conscious decision to keep our joy and not get aggravated at every little thing: the elderly mom, the rebellious kids, the traffic, the boss, the list is endless.

Personal Story

My mom hasn't figured this out yet and she's 94 years old and is aggravated daily about one thing or another. Nothing makes her happy. I've given up trying and told her it is not MY responsibility to make her happy. Friends, is it not our responsibility to make anyone else happy either, not your parents, not your kids, not your spouse. That burden falls squarely on each of our shoulders. Sure, have compassion for them but don't let their situation or negativity steal your joy. 

Today I am sharing the next 3 tips as promised. If you missed the first 3 tips for getting your joy back, here is the post again. 

                                               

Tip #4: Pay attention to your thoughts. 

Here's a quick mindfulness practice I do every morning to get in the right frame of mind. As soon as my eyes open, I declare this verse - out loud:  "This is the day the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it." (Ps. 118:24). Notice the emphasis on the words "I will". This indicates I am making a conscious DECISION to be joyful. We must be deliberate about our frame of mind, if we want to stay joyful on a daily basis and into our later years. 

Do you find yourself dwelling on the same issue for days or nights on end? Picture a car stuck in a ditch with the wheels whirling and whirling. This is what our minds are doing when we ruminate or over-think and it is a joy-stealer. When we spin our mental wheels trying to figure something out or solve a problem that has no solution, this burns us out mentally and energetically. It can also cause headaches and migraines. I know this from first-hand experience. 

How to Avoid Overthinking
There are two ways to get out of the overthinking cycle. 

1) decide on an action to take in the moment. Taking some action makes us feel less out of control of the situation. 

2) decide to put the issue on the back burner till we get clarity. This takes the pressure off of us.

I know this is tough, but we are not in control of the answers. We need to learn to trust in God to reveal them in HIS timing, not ours. It's another opportunity to practice letting go.

Where Faith Comes In

Another example I recently had to deal with was what to do about my 94 yr old mother who fractured her back. Without going into all the details, there were a lot of factors to consider, as anyone who has elderly parents knows. I assured my sister and my mother, we would figure it out slowly. I kept saying "Let's stay in today" and they calmed down. Actually, I am pretty proud of myself that I did stay so composed and in the moment and did not freak out. I trusted that God would show us the way and he did. This is when Faith and a spiritual practice pays off, friends. Not freaking out when uncertainty hits and answers are complicated. 

Practice Mindfulness Daily
The natural state of our mind should be peaceful. Scripture exhorts us to "take every thought captive" (2 Cor 10:5). This means to pay attention to what we're thinking about. Our thoughts can take us down the proverbial rabbit hole if we don't learn how to be mindful and take control of them.   

The good news is practicing mindfulness helps us to be more aware of our thoughts and our emotions. We need to catch ourselves ruminating or dwelling on negative topics and bring ourselves back to the present moment, the here and now, because that is where JOY is found. Joy is not found in yesterday or tomorrow, folks. By practicing spiritual techniques (Check out my new ebook, "Ignite the Power Within: 10 Steps to Supercharge Your Spiritual Growth), slowly, the grooves in our brains will be rewired and we will have better thinking patterns over time.

No matter what thoughts pop into my head, I remind myself of the truths I believe in. "Lord, you are in control of everything in my life. This might not look like a good thing to me right now, but I know you can work it out for my good. I will take responsibility for my thoughts, decisions, and actions. I will let go and trust you to work it out in your timing. I will rejoice and be glad today. I will take care of myself and keep my distance from negative people." This helps strengthen my spiritual muscle and keeps my peace and joy. 

Tip #5: Have some fun. 
As a single parent of two growing boys for many years combined with a full-time career plus grad school, it was hard to find time to have fun. Even now as an older single lady with not so many friends, it is hard to find time to have fun. Now I will admit having fun has changed over the years. I used to love to go ballroom dancing, or any kind of dancing for that matter. Now fun is enjoying the pool, working on my blog or my lettering, making a good dinner. Fun is something you get to do and you choose to do that is pleasurable that keeps you in the present moment. 

Keep Play in the Picture 
No matter how busy we might be, however, play is vital to our well-being. (See #5 in my recent book "Take Back Your Life". )  Some of us, including me, are so responsible, we have to schedule downtime and play into our to-do lists.

Others play too much and neglect their responsibilities and their health. We need to find balance in our daily lives if we want to keep our joy. Having fun makes room for joy to pop back up. 

What do you like to do? What takes your mind off your problems and brings you into the present moment? Choose a healthy activity that will restore and energize you, instead of depleting you or taking you out of the present moment like watching the boob tube or playing video games. Something out of doors is always good this time of year.  Walking is a great way to let go of stress and get a bit of exercise and fresh air. Team up with a friend or loved one if you like. Or maybe go for a bike ride, or do some gardening. Even a half hour will do you a world of good and help you reconnect with your joy.  

Tip #6: Let go of control. 
We all like to be in control. My issue stems from being raised in a chaotic home, where everything was out of control, but most of us want to be "in control" to some degree. The truth is there are only a handful of things that are truly under our control. Much of life - aka other people - are not and the sooner we come to understand this, the more peace and less stress we will have.  

Do what you can to attend to any given situation (if you need to) and then give it to God. Notice we have a part in fixing our problems. We can't just throw up our hands and say "Well, God will take care of it." When we do what we can, God will do what we can't. This is where faith, patience and obedience come in. 

If you want more peace in your daily life, learn how and when to let go. I talk about all the ins and outs of letting go of control in my new book, "Ignite the Power Within." Letting go is a spiritual practice and if you don't know what it is, how it applies to your life, or how to do it, I encourage you to order my new book and learn more today.

So there you have my 6 tips to getting your joy back.  
We all go through difficult situations and I'm certainly not minimizing what you or I are going through right now, but I have learned that stuff will keep coming. As author, Sonia Choquette says, "We are souls on a journey to heal, grow and evolve and these trials are our tests to pass".  It is up to us to decide how each situation will affect us and how we will respond to it. The quicker we can let go of unhappy, negative thoughts, the more we can enjoy each day.

Reflection:
How about you? Is there something or someone stealing your joy right now? Are you feeling overwhelmed with all your responsibilities? What changes do you need to make to have more peace and joy? Don't let the challenges of life steal either one. Make a decision to let go of control and enjoy each day for the gift it is. That's why they call it "the present".

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Stay tuned for more positive and practical wisdom to help you ignite the power within and discover YOUR destiny! 

Until next time, keep smiling and keep looking up!

Ariel Paz