How to Spiritually Connect with Your Higher Power

We are all on a spiritual journey, whether we realize it or not. We were made to know our Higher Power, the Divine, God, or whatever name you want to use. A relationship with God is the most important relationship we could ever have. 

The Problem 
The problem is many people have been turned off by organized religion, wounded by churches, priests, fathers, and past experiences. I wonder how many people read the Bible these days. Because of this, many of us don't have a clear path on how to connect to the Divine and we lack the courage and faith we need to move forward in this challenging world we live in. So this week I am sharing some ways I have found to connect with my Higher Power and strengthen my spiritual muscle.  

The Solution

1. The Word of God 

First, let me say this. I believe the clearest and most direct way to know and connect with the Divine is through reading the Bible. Even though the Bible is 2700 years old, human nature has not changed. The need for guidance has not changed and neither has the need for comfort, assurance, and consolation changed. All of these can be found in the Bible. There are many translations out there and you can easily check which you prefer by visiting this website. 

Whenever I had a big decision to make, I go straight to the Bible. The book of Proverbs is a good place to find wisdom about all sorts of important topics. Sure you can go talk to a bunch of friends, but you have no assurance that their "wisdom" will be what you need. Other times, I think of situations in the Bible and apply what God said about it to my circumstance. It gives me peace and guides me to making wise decisions. For more on making wise decisions, enter "decisions" in the search box on my blog.

2. Prayer and Meditation 
As I've stated in my previous posts, prayer is talking to God and meditation is listening. Both of these activities are helpful in connecting with the Divine. 

Prayer is powerful and it is even more powerful when we infuse it with scripture. There is supernatural power in prayer. The Lord is required to fulfill his word so when we quote scripture back to him it does many things. Read about the importance of praying scripture here. 

Meditation is listening to God. With our hectic schedules, how often do we make time to just be still and get quiet? This is when we can hear that still small voice inside. There are many benefits to a regular meditation practice. To learn more about meditation, its benefits, and how to do it, read my posts on it here. 

3. Journaling

I have been journaling most of my life. It helps me process the events of the day, connect with my emotions, reduces stress, and much more. Did you know it has been scientifically proven that journaling can also help boost the immune system and decrease the symptoms of chronic ailments such as arthritis, asthma and other health conditions? Read this article for more. 

The key to journaling is to get your feelings out on paper. Many people, including myself, have a hard time expressing their feelings. Journaling is a good start. The next step is to communicate them to others. Journaling also helps us to identify habits and unhealthy behaviors and their triggers. I have used it to help me manage migraine and break bad habits. 

For Reflection:

Getting to know God is not as scary or as difficult as it may seem. These three activities are a great start. Which one will you pick today? Write and let us know and why you chose that. 

I hope you enjoyed this post. If so pass it on to a friend who could benefit. To join our community and receive my weekly posts simply enter your email on the pop up page or in the space provided on this site. You'll also receive a copy my free e-guide entitled "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path". 

Until next time, I wish you peace and stillness and remember...

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

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Why You Need to Journal Daily

A lot happens during the course of the day. And that means a lot of thoughts. I've read that the average person has approximately 60,000 thoughts per day. That is the average person. Many of these simply float by not even recognized by our conscious minds. That's why we wake up in the middle of the night, our brains are trying to process the events and emotions of the day. So this week, I'm sharing 5 tips on how and why it is important to start a daily journaling practice.  

Journaling is a Spiritual Discipline
Did you keep a diary when you were younger? The keeper of secret thoughts and dreams for no one's eyes but yours to see? Writing in a diary is a form of journaling, which is a key component of a spiritual practice. And it is not just for girls either. We all need to get in touch with our thoughts and emotions. Men have a particularly hard time doing this because of the way their brains are wired. And we all know how bad accumulated stress is for our brains and our bodies.                                                           

Benefit #1:Reduces Stress
We all have it. Some days more than others, but it important to process stressful events before our head hits the pillow at night or at least, schedule a time to process the events of the day. When we journal, we gain clarity about situations. It helps us feel less anxious and helps us get to the root cause of our moods so we don't take it out on an innocent friend or relative. Here's an interesting article that talks about sleep and stress. 

Benefit #2: Helps Process Emotions
Journaling helps us to process the difficult emotions and feelings of our day. Often we brush aside any negative feelings, or ignore them completely but our emotions are messengers and we need to pay attention to what they are trying to tell us. Journaling gives us time to process and see just what is bothering us. I have a sticky note to remind me to check in with my feelings during the day. 

Benefit #3: Helps Us Be More Creative
When we slow down our minds, ideas and solutions surface. We can hear from God and that still small voice inside. Thoughts go by so quickly, if we don't write them down, we may lose them entirely. 

Benefit #4: Helps Us Get in Touch with our Needs
When we find ourselves easily frustrated or short-fused, there is a good chance we are not getting some need met. Asking "What do I need right now?" is a good starting point. Many of us are really good at taking care of other people's needs, but not so great at taking care of our own. The other day I was journaling and I remembered I wanted to make a massage appointment. I haven't had one in years, and had forgotten the visit to the local beauty spa. It is important to recognize our needs and make sure they get met so we are in a better frame of mind to deal with others. It's called self-care. 

Benefit #5: Helps Us to Heal from Painful Events
I am a strong proponent of "getting it out", whether it be to a person or on paper. Verbalizing or writing it down is a healthy way of processing an issue or an event. If you don't feel comfortable talking about a situation with someone else, journal it. I guarantee you will feel so much better. Whatever you do, do not keep it bottled up inside you. That is both physically and mentally unhealthy. 

For Reflection
Are you ready to try journaling? I suggest buying a notebook of some kind. I like the spiral-bound kind, which are easier to flip the pages. Choose a nice writing tool, something that feels good in your hand. And then focus on writing down your thoughts and feelings from the day, not your daily to-do list.

If you are angry or overwhelmed, write about it. If you feel depressed or anxious about something, write about it. The key is to get it out of your system and onto paper. There is some sort of spiritual process that releases stress and tension when you put your feelings on paper. You want this to be a sort of clearing process so that when you finish you feel more at peace and calm. 

If you enjoyed this post, do join our blog community by entering your email address in the box on the right. I post weekly on Tuesdays. In addition, you will receive a copy of my FREE eguide "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path"  - a short eguide to get you started on the journey of a lifetime. 

Stay tuned for more on how to ignite the power within so you can DISCOVER YOUR DESTINY!

Until next time, 

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

  

3 Steps to a Better Relationship with God and Others

Do you sometimes feel disconnected from others? Far from God?  Your Higher Power? If so, you're not the only one. We all struggle with these times of seeming isolation and loneliness, even the married folk among us. It is in these times that it is even more important to turn inward and listen to that still small voice. 

Sometimes God allows these dry periods so we can come into a more intimate relationship with Him. We may not know exactly how to go about it so today I'm sharing three steps to developing a closer relationship with God.

Personal Story 
I was at a good friend's wedding having dinner, when a gentleman at our table shared that he had read my book, "The Power of Faith". He said he wished he had the same type of faith to help him get through the trials in his life and asked me if I thought if it was possible for anyone to develop a strong faith.

"Absolutely", I replied without a moment's hesitation.

In fact, God promises us this: "You will seek and find me when you search for me with all your heart," (Jer. 29:13). Just as healthy earthly parents want a good relationship with their kids, so our heavenly Father wants a close relationship with us. In the same way, if we want an intimate close relationship with another person or with God, we must be intentional about it.

"Well, how do you do that?" my typically shy and reserved friend inquired.

Now I know many of us are stuck in this sensory, material world we live in. If we can't see, feel, hear, touch, or smell it, we don't believe it exists. God does exist only in another reality - the spiritual realm and, as spiritual beings, we have to get comfortable operating in this realm as well. The good news is the same steps we take when we are serious about getting to know someone are the same steps we can use in developing a relationship with God.

1. Have an open heart.
Just as when we begin to fall in love with another person and believe they want a relationship with us, the same applies to God. We have to believe in our heart that it is possible to have a deeper relationship with God, that He loves you deeply, and wants to have an intimate relationship with you. God wants to connect you, just as much as the spiritual part of you wants to connect with Him. Once we let this truth permeate our minds, we open the doors for an amazing adventure.

2. Spend more time together.
Getting to know God is much the same as getting to know another person. When we make it a priority to spend time with someone, we get to know them at a deeper level. We come to know who they are, their likes and dislikes, their values, how they think. We each have our own way of spending time with God. Some of us like to take a walk by ourselves, go for a hike or a bike ride in nature. Others prefer to listen to relaxing music or work in the garden. Still others find God in a communal approach such as a church setting or a meditation group. Whatever puts you in a calm and receptive state of mind is conducive to meeting with God.

3. Learn how God feels and thinks about things.

In the same way we get to know another person by learning how he or she thinks and feels, we can get to know who God is. He is not some illusive being out there yonder. He is up close and personal. He wants to make himself known to us, to speak to us, and guide each of us - personally. 

These days, when we want to find out information about someone, we do a Google search and look them up on the Internet. We can do the same thing with God, believe it or not. We go to a reliable source and seek information. In fact, God has put much information about himself, his thoughts, his desires, and his ways of operating in one collection of books known as the Bible. 

Now I know many people have a problem with the Bible, saying it's old and antiquated but the truth is not much has changed in the way of relationships and human nature since it was written. And for sure, God has not changed. At all. 

Side note. Did you know that the way experts determine the validity of a manuscript is by how many copies there are of it? Did you know that the Bible is one of, if not the most copied manuscript in history?

When we make time to read Scripture, we learn who God is, what He thinks, and what is important to him. We also open up the channel of communication with Him to speak to us. You will be amazed when you start reading the Word, how some passage will jump right out at you and you will know that it is meant for you. Try it and see!

"One more thing," I said to my friend. "Ask God to reveal Himself to you, and He will." My friend smiled and nodded.

For Reflection

Do you - like Jacob in the Bible - struggle to find God? Do you desire to have a better communion with your Higher Power? Are you willing to put time into your relationship with others? the Divine? 

So there you have it, friends: three steps to developing a deeper relationship with God. Do post a comment, and feel free to share this with a friend or send me a question. If you'd like to join our blog community and receive my weekly newsletter, enter your email address in the box provided. You'll also receive my free guide entitled "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path". And be sure to pop on over to my Pinterest boards and check out all the cool stuff I have collected for you. And do check out my collection of books on faith and spiritual growth here. 

Stay tuned for more positive and practical wisdom to help you ignite the power within so you can discover YOUR destiny!

Until next time, keep looking up!

Ariel Paz

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How to Receive Guidance from God

Decisions, decisions. We make a lot of decisions both big and small on a daily basis. Do you have trouble making decisions? Does making them stress you out? Would you like to have more faith in your decisions? If so, this post is for you. 

As a single mom and single lady, I've had a lot of big decisions to make; from dealing with rebellious teenagers to selling the family home, to buying a new condo, to whether to leave my job, to where to relocate my elderly mom who lived out of state. There are also decisions of less importance like where to go on vacation and who to date. What decision is facing you today? 

Why We Have it Backwards
People seek guidance in different ways, and all of them have their place - to a point, but the first place we should go to is the Word of God. Sadly, the reverse is often true. We go to other people or our feelings first, and then when things don't work out we go to God. Maybe. 

Folks, human beings still struggle with the choices of life and the principles of God are there to guide and direct us because - as we know- making the right choice can be difficult. There is a better way. 

                                              

1. Get really quiet.
I mean for an extended period of time. No, you don't have to go to an ashram or become a monk. You can find stillness in your own home, in nature, in prayer and meditation. We have to quiet our minds and clear the mental muddle if we want to tune in to that still small voice. I like to do this in the early morning or while I am journaling. Journaling helps get my thoughts and feelings off my mind and onto paper. It is one of the 10 skills to help us grow spiritually. 

2. Say a little prayer.

This simple step can have a major impact on your decisions and the outcome. Ask God to direct your steps. After all, He promises to give wisdom to those who ask and who are not double-minded (James 1:5).

3. Open the word of God.
Now if you are not a regular bible-reader, sometimes you can just flip it open and start reading. The Lord will often give you the answer. However, it is better if you are somewhat familiar with the Bible so you can know where to look. I ask myself the question "Who in the Bible had a similar situation to deal with?" Another option is to go to the book of Proverbs where there is a ton of practical wisdom that applies to daily life. 

4. Seek wise counsel

This means discuss the decision with people who have good heads on their shoulders, people you respect, preferably Christians. Your immediate family members might be helpful. Or a close-friend. We are exhorted to seek wise counsel (Prov 15:22) from multiple sources.

5. Wait for peace
Do not - under any circumstances - make a decision you are still conflicted about. This is the worst thing you can do because you are not at peace about it. Sadly, I went ahead and walked down the aisle when I did not have a peace about the decision. I guilted myself into it but you can read about it in my book, "The Power of Faith". 

6. Do not ask for a sign.
Sorry folks, and yes, I know there are instances in the Bibles where people asked for signs, but we have to listen to what Jesus said. Matthew 12:39 calls the people who begged for signs "an evil and adulterous generation". For more on asking for signs, see this article "Is it right to ask God for a sign?"

7. Ask if it is God's will 
Now this is the tough part. It is hard to put aside our own feelings and desires, but if we want God's best it is crucial to do so. Our flesh wants to lead us into what will satisfy it, temporarily. We have to have the big picture and think long-term. Will I be happy with this choice 5 - 10 years down the road?

Personal Story
Years ago, in my early dating life, I thought I was in love with this guy. He was Jewish and that was the first obstacle. But God ordained to have him meet with a messianic rabbi, and a former accountant, same as my friend, to explain to him about Christ. Well, we were close to getting engaged, but then when I met his father, who also had the same critical, sarcastic traits I asked myself "You are looking at your future. Is this the kind of person you want to live with for the rest of your life?" The answer was no. 

8. Wait for God's Best 
God has three answers to our requests: yes, no, and not now. We want things on our own terms and our own time-table. We want it NOW. The problem is this -God's time frame is usually not the same as ours. If we rush ahead with our plans before the time is right, things won't work out. I could tell you a story about that too, but not today. 

The yes answer usually comes on very strong. You can sense it in your spirit. Things just fall into place. You have a sense of peace. You ask, seek, and knock and the door opens. 

The no answer feels like a knot in your stomach. Something just doesn't feel right. You don't have peace about it. This is especially important when it comes to relationships. 

Another personal story. 
I dated this one guy who checked all the boxes. Christian - check. Attends church - check. Good job - check. Sense of humor - check. But something didn't feel right. There was a lot of arguing over stupid stuff. I couldn't put my finger on it, even when he wanted to put at $36k ring on it. Then one Christmas, it all became crystal clear. He wasn't the person he was pretending to be. I broke it off before the New Year because once I am clear, I take prompt action. 

The wait answer is harder to accept, because we want things NOW. Things don't fall into place. There are setbacks and delays, but you still sense in your spirit that the answer is not no. So keep being obedient. Keep doing the right thing until the path opens. It can take years but it is important to keep being obedient even when we don't see our prayers answered.

For Reflection
What decision do you need to make right now? What are you feeling in your spirit? Are you feeling a check or a green light so to speak ? These steps will guide you into making the right decision. 

For more on how to develop this skill and 9 other skills for spiritual growth, order your copy of my newest book, Ignite the Power Within: 10 steps to supercharge your spiritual growth".

Stay tuned and until next time, 

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

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How to Incorporate Prayer in Your Daily Life

When life throws you an unexpected curve ball who is the first person you turn to? Your spouse? Your best friend? Your mother? What about those times when you don't know who to turn to? Who will understand? Who will comfort you? This is when I suggest the first person you talk to is God. As in any human relationship, the first step to getting to know someone is to talk to them, and it is the same with getting to know God. Prayer is one way to communicate with God. 

Many people minimize the power of prayer, sadly. They talk to everybody else, and talk to God last, if at all. This is backwards. Man's wisdom will never equal the wisdom of God. When you need guidance, direction, healing - turn to God first, then turn to your friends. 

Super in Your Natural
There is supernatural power in prayer, especially if you combine it with scripture. Woah! That is a double whammy of power. James 5:16 says this about prayer: "The fervent prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." In other words, we need to put energy into our prayers. Prayer moves the hand of God. 

                                     

Personal Story
I have seen many miracles in my life thanks to the power of prayer and God's great grace. I have been redeemed from anxieties, afflictions, addictions, health issues, financial bondage and much more. I encourage you to read my inspiring true story, "The Power of Faith: a journey to healing, wholeness, and harmony."  In it, I share a different perspective on how to view the inevitable trials and tribulations of life that are sure to come our way some time our another.

I also share the faith lessons I learned that will help you strengthen your spiritual muscle as well. Happy to say that it is now available in audio format here. Please leave a review wherever you found the book. 

Benefits of Prayer 
Prayer helps us to relax and find peace. It strengthens us knowing there is a divine power that cares about us and we are not left to our own devices. Some situations we cannot handle on our own. This is when we need to ask for God's help. Prayer also helps us to connect and feel closer to God. 

Often we think God is some distant being way out yonder, but really he is right beside us, all the time and his name is Jesus. Prayer activates the hand of God. Just like a loving father when his children cry out, God hears the cries of his children and he commands his angels to get to work. One of my favorite verses is this promise: "God hears the cries of his people and he answers them. He rescues them from ALL their troubles." (Ps. 34:17). Notice the inclusion of the word "all". That doesn't leave anything out. God is here for you and me whatever we are going through. 

Prayer Shifts Our Focus
In times of trouble, we tend to dwell on the situation. We ruminate. We overthink. We let the problem or situation consume us and steal our peace. Prayer helps us with all of that by shifting our focus from the problem to the All-Mighty God who sees and controls everything.

This is why is it so important to know who God is. One of God's attributes is omnipotent. You know what that means? He has ALL power. Nothing can stop him from working on our behalf. Nothing. 

Prayer shifts the burden from our shoulders to God's shoulders which are much more capable of holding them. You know that song "He's got the whole world in his hands." 

For Reflection 
What situation would you like to give to God today? Is it a health concern? A relationship situation? A finances thing? Whatever it is, I encourage you to take it to Jesus today. Right now even. I'll help you get started:

"Lord, Jesus. I lift up to you (insert your situation or person_______.) Please heal, help, comfort, guide me/them in this time of need. Lord, you hear my prayer and I trust you to answer in your perfect timing. Jesus, I ask for your peace and presence as I go thru this storm. I thank you in advance for everything you are going to do and I pray this all in the mighty name of Jesus." 

If you enjoyed this post, please share it with a friend. This world needs a spiritual practice more each passing day. 

If you enjoyed this post, do consider joining our community of growth-oriented folks. Simply enter your email address in the box provided on the right and you'll receive my weekly newsletter. You'll also receive my free ebook "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path" to help you along your spiritual growth journey. 

In the meantime, check out my other offerings on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Apple, Google Play.  Pop on over to Pinterest and enjoy the collection I have curated for you. 

Until next time, thanks for reading, and

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 
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How to Surrender to God

We've all heard the expression "Let go and let God", right? I assumed everyone understood what this means until I posted this photo on Facebook and a friend came back with the question "How do you do that?"

Another word for letting go is to surrender. Detach. Give people space. It is a crucial skill to learn if we want to have peace in our lives and in our relationships. Let's jump in. 

1. First step is to realize that letting go is an ongoing process.
We learn to let go. It doesn't come naturally. We develop the ability to let go gradually as we experience loss, grief, and pain in our lives such as when a loved one dies or leaves home, a beloved pet dies, or when a relationship ends. Letting go is an ongoing process because life is constantly in a state of change.

2.  Another term related to letting go is "detachment" which means separating ourselves from another person. 
In recovery terms, detachment means emotionally disconnecting from the abusive, destructive or unhealthy behavior of another person for our own well-being. We think we are being caring, but really, we are being codependent. 

Detaching does not mean we stop loving or caring about the other person but we no longer allow their behaviors to steal our peace and joy. We don't get into it with them. We stop trying to change them or get them to change. It's not our monkey. 

Some extreme examples would be living with an alcoholic, an addict, a gambler, or an angry person. Sometimes, we have to detach from family and friends who, for whatever reason, are unable to participate fully in a healthy relationship. It takes two healthy people to make any relationship work.

When we detach, we find more time and energy to love and take care of  ourselves and we allow the other person the time and space to deal with their own issues. It is truly the loving thing to do for both parties. 

3. Letting go has to do with responsibility. 

Sometimes we take on responsibility for problems we do not own. For example, a parent taking financial responsibility for an adult child. A mother not allowing her children to suffer the consequences of their actions. A spouse covering for a partner's addiction such as overspending, drinking, gambling, getting into fights, etc. Codependency causes people to take on others' consequences to the detriment of their own physical and financial well-being. 

4. Letting go is the opposite of controlling. 

People who are overly responsible are often codependent and usually have control issues. Codependents think they are taking care of others, but in reality, it is a form of control based on fear. Most people have control issues to some degree, but fearful people are on the extreme end of the spectrum. If someone you know is controlling, one question to ask them is: "What are you afraid of here?" This will help bring to light the irrational fear they may be struggling with.

No one wants to be controlled.  We are responsible for managing our own lives, but not the lives of those around us. Often, our "caring" efforts are seen as controlling. This is when relationships deteriorate. When we let go of control, we allow the other person the freedom and the dignity to make their own choices and experience the results of those choices.

5. Letting go applies to every area of our lives.
Many people hold on to stuff for years and years for emotional reasons. I once dated a guy who had an entire office filled with old newspapers he'd never read. His garage was packed with stuff his kids used when they were little. These people have a hard time "letting go" of stuff. They've even made a TV show out of this behavior called "Hoarders". If you have a hard time parting with material things, your house is cluttered, and your garage is overflowing, you may want to examine your reasons for holding on to all of that. Does it make you feel loved? Secure? Are you holding on to the past? Think of cleaning house as an opportunity to practice letting go and open yourself up to NEW ADVENTURES!

6.  Surrender to God's will.
When we learn to let go in our lives, we are basically saying "Thy will be done" or "Que sera sera". We no longer insist on our agendas, our plans, and our timeframes. We are more flexible and resilient when the unexpected happens. We feel more peace and tranquility because we have let go of the need to control the outcome of events. We really can't control very much in life. We can't control the stock market, our relatives, our kids, or what happens in the world so we might as well accept life as it is and enjoy it the best we can. Here is the Serenity Prayer in its entirety:

The Serenity Prayer

 God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardship as a pathway to peace; taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that You will make all things right

if I surrender to Your will; so that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next. Amen. 

Reinhold Niebuhr

Personal Story

So yesterday, I was all dressed and ready to go hear an outdoor concert about 20 minutes from me. I checked my tires and they were on the low side so decided to try and fill them myself. Well. After 3 gas stations and 2 broken air machines, one of my tires had no air in it. The "Check tire pressure" warning came up.

Immediately, I said a prayer to make it back to another gas station and thankfully, their machine was working. Sort of. I was able to inflate the tire. This was in 97 degree heat, mind you. An hour had gone by. My white capris were filthy and I was a sweaty disgusted mess. I paused to think and pray. Then I did what I'm telling you to do. I let my plans go. Things happen. I drove home and headed straight for the pool. Immediately all the stress washed away and my joy returned. Folks, when things seem to work against you for whatever reason, choose whatever will bring you peace in the moment. 

7. Evaluate my priorities.
There are only 24 hours in every day and we only have so many days to live. How will I choose to live them and with whom? I reexamine my priorities several times a year. I make a conscious choice on where, how, and with whom I want to spend my time.

I have learned that in order to add something or someone new to my life, I must let go of something or someone else or I will be out of balance. When we let go of an unhealthy relationship, we are open to receive a healthier one in its place. First, we will get a test to see if we will go back to our old patterns of accepting unhealthy behavior. After we pass that test, God will bring us healthier friends. 

When we let go of anxiety and worry, we make room for peace and joy. When we let go of activity, we make room for relaxation and self-care. It's all a matter of evaluating what is important to us in the here and now.

8. Choosing Peace over Control 
If we want to have more peace and joy and less stress in our lives, learning to let go is one of life's most important lessons.  I have a post- it note on which is written a quote from Oprah Winfrey that says: "All stress comes from resisting what is". I think she is right on. 

Some of us, including me as an oldest child in a dysfunctional family, have become too responsible for others. And yes, it is still a problem. When the adults in a family don't assume their rightful responsibilities, then the children are left to do so, sadly. A sign we are too controlling is when we start to experience push-back from other people. This is the time to step back and give the relationship space and distance. 

Personal Story - Dealing with elderly relatives 

So my 95 year old mother was in a sad state. She couldn't walk. She fractured her back earlier last year, and we had to move her to assisted living. I had to take over handling all of her stuff - her phone, her drs appts, her physical therapist, her medications, her finances, her bills. You may be dealing with a similar situation. It's tough on everyone. 

Well, I thought I was helping her by taking on these responsibilities, but what I came to realize is she became angry or resentful at me for doing so. Sadly. Who else was going to care for her? 

Then it dawned on me. She is angry at herself and projecting it onto me. So I have decided to do what I am telling you to do - take a step back. Let her call me. Stop being so responsible for all her stuff. She still has a decent mind and can and should speak up for herself. It was a tough lesson to learn but when people are ungrateful for your help, maybe they don't really want it. Let me say that again.

To Learn More on Letting Go

If you want more information on letting go, get your copy of my new book "Ignite the Power Within: 10 Steps to Supercharge Your Spiritual Growth", In it, I explain in detail the how, when, and what of letting go and the various areas of our lives that we get to practice this in. It is life changing for sure. 

For Reflection
So what have you let go of that made a difference in your life? What do you need to let go of today that could bring you more peace? Leave a comment or post in your journal. 

If you enjoyed this post, join our blog community. Enter your email address in the box provided & you'll receive my weekly posts and also a copy of my free e-guide entitled "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path" to get you started on your exciting spiritual journey. I am taking the month of August off from blogging to work on other pursuits so enjoy your summer and meet me back here in September. 

Stay tuned for more on having more peace in our relationships and our lives. 

Until next time, keep looking up!

Ariel Paz

6 Easy Ways to Get Your Joy Back - Part 2

"How am I feeling this morning?" This is a good question to ask ourselves before we start our day. "Am I feeling joyful?" If we don't mindfully check in with ourselves we'll go around feeling blah and we'll turn to distractions, alcohol, shopping or some other addictive behavior to make us feel better. If we aren't feeling the joy of the Lord, something is wrong so what to do about it? This week I'm sharing 3 more steps to getting our joy back. 

How high is your joy meter today? High, low, or medium? Things can happen in a minute that can steal our joy, which is where mindfulness and faith come in. It's a question of being aware of when something irritates us and then making a mindful decision whether we are going to let it get to us. 

Joy flows in and through us on a daily basis but we must make a conscious decision to keep our joy and not get aggravated at every little thing: the elderly mom, the rebellious kids, the traffic, the boss, the list is endless. 

Today I am sharing the next 3 tips as promised. If you missed the first 3 tips for getting your joy back, here is the post again. 

                                               

Tip #4: Pay attention to your thoughts. 

Here's a quick mindfulness practice I do every morning to get in the right frame of mind. As soon as my eyes open, I declare this verse - out loud:  "This is the day the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it." (Ps. 118:24). Notice the emphasis on the words "I will". This indicates I am making a conscious DECISION to be joyful. We must be deliberate about our frame of mind, if we want to stay joyful on a daily basis and into our later years. 

Do you find yourself dwelling on the same issue or person for days or nights on end? Picture a car stuck in a ditch with the wheels whirling and whirling. This is what our minds are doing when we ruminate or over-think and it is a joy-stealer. When we spin our mental wheels trying to figure something out or solve a problem that has no solution, this burns us out mentally and energetically. It can also cause headaches and migraines. I know this from first-hand experience. 

How to Avoid Overthinking
There are two ways to get out of the overthinking cycle. 

1) decide on an action to take in the moment. Taking some type of action takes the pressure off and makes us feel less out of control of the situation. 

2) realize we are overthinking something and decide to put the issue on the back burner till we get clarity. This takes the pressure off and I'm all about taking the pressure off. 

I know this is tough, but we are not in control of the when the answers will come.  We need to learn to trust in God to reveal them in HIS timing, not ours. It's another opportunity to practice letting go.

Exercise Your Faith

Another example I had to deal with last year was what to do about my 94 yr old mother who fractured her back. Without going into all the details, there were a lot of factors to consider, as anyone who has elderly parents knows. I assured my sister and my mother, who were both freaking out, that we would figure it out slowly. I kept saying "Let's stay in today" to calm them down.

Actually, I am pretty proud of myself that I did stay so composed and in the moment and did not freak out. I trusted that God would show us the way and he did. She went to rehab which she hated and then I found her an assisted living facility that served her chocolate cake the first day she got there. Her comment was "I should have done this years ago." It is in these types of critical, stressful situations that Faith and a spiritual practice pays off, friends. A spiritual practice helps us to not freak out when uncertainty hits and answers are complicated because we have a God who cares. 

Practice Mindfulness Daily
The natural state of our mind is to be peaceful but there are so many things to worry/stress/think about in every day life. Scripture exhorts us to "take every thought captive" (2 Cor 10:5). This means to pay attention to what we're thinking about. Our thoughts can take us down the proverbial rabbit hole if we don't learn how to be mindful and take control of them.   

The good news is practicing mindfulness helps us to be more aware of our thoughts and our emotions. We need to catch ourselves ruminating or dwelling on negative topics and bring ourselves back to the present moment, the here and now, because that is where JOY is found. Joy is not found in yesterday or tomorrow, folks. By practicing spiritual techniques (Check out my new ebook, "Ignite the Power Within: 10 Steps to Supercharge Your Spiritual Growth), slowly, the grooves in our brains will be rewired and we will have better thinking patterns over time.

No matter what thoughts pop into my head, I remind myself of the truths I believe in. "Lord, I know you see this situation. It might not look good to me right now, but your word says you work all things out for my good. I will take responsibility for my thoughts, decisions, and actions. I will stay in peace and trust you to guide me. I will rejoice and be glad today. I will take care of myself and set firm boundaries. Thank you, Lord." This helps strengthen my spiritual muscle and keeps my peace and joy. 

Tip #5: Have some fun. 
As a single parent of two growing boys for many years combined with a full-time career plus grad school, it was hard to find time to have fun. Even now as an older single lady with few friends, it is hard to find time to have fun. Now I will admit having fun has changed over the years. I used to love to go ballroom dancing, or any kind of dancing for that matter. Now fun is enjoying the pool, working on my blog or my lettering, making a good dinner. Fun is something you choose to do that is pleasurable that keeps you in the present moment. What do you like to do for fun these days?

Keep Play in the Picture 
No matter how busy we might be, however, play is vital to our well-being. (See #5 in my recent book "Take Back Your Life". )  Some of us, including me, are so responsible, we have to schedule downtime and play into our to-do lists. As I write this I am thinking when was the last time I played...does watching a soccer game fall into the play category? I think so. 

Others play too much and neglect their responsibilities as well as their health. We need to find balance in our daily lives if we want to keep our joy. Having fun makes room for joy to pop back up because it lets the pressure out of the pot. 

What do you like to do? What takes your mind off your problems and brings you into the present moment? Choose a healthy activity that will restore and energize you, instead of depleting you or taking you out of the present moment like watching the boob tube or playing video games. Something out of doors is always good this time of year.  Walking is a great way to let go of stress and get a bit of exercise and fresh air. Team up with a friend or loved one if you can. Or maybe go for a bike ride, or do some gardening. Even a half hour will do you a world of good and help you clear your mind and reconnect with your joy.  

Tip #6: Let go of control. 
We all like to be in control. My issue stems from being raised in a chaotic home, where everything was out of control, but most of us want to be "in control" to some degree. The truth is there are only a handful of things that are truly under our control. Much of life - aka other people - are not and the sooner we come to understand this, the more peace and less stress we will have.  

Do what you can to attend to any given situation (if you need to) and then give it to God. Notice we have a part in fixing our problems. We can't just throw up our hands and say "Well, God will take care of it." When we do what we can, God will do what we can't. This is where faith, patience and obedience come in. 

If you want more peace in your daily life, learn how and when to let go. I talk about all the ins and outs of letting go of control in my new book, "Ignite the Power Within." Letting go is a spiritual practice and if you don't know what it is, how it applies to your life, or how to do it, I encourage you to order my new book and learn more today.

So there you have my 6 tips to getting your joy back.  
We all go through difficult situations and I'm certainly not minimizing what you or I are going through right now, but I have learned that stuff will ALWAYS keep coming at us. As author, Sonia Choquette says in her book "Soul Lessons and Soul Purpose", "We are souls on a journey to heal, grow and evolve and these trials are our tests to pass".  It is up to us to decide how each situation will affect us and how we will respond to it. The quicker we can let go of unhappy, negative thoughts, the more we can enjoy each day.

Reflection:
How about you? Is there something or someone stealing your joy right now? Are you feeling overwhelmed with all your responsibilities? What changes do you need to make to have more peace and joy? Don't let the challenges of life steal either one. Make a decision to let go of control and enjoy each day for the gift it is. That's why they call it "the present".

If this article was helpful and you'd like to join our community and receive my weekly posts, enter your email address in the box provided. As a thank you, I'll send you my free e-guide entitled "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path". 

For more tips and info on a wide-variety of topics, pop on over to Pinterest to check out my collection on health and wellness, fashion, recipes, exercise and diet, and so much more. https://www.pinterest.com/arielpaz/pins/

Stay tuned for more positive and practical wisdom to help you ignite the power within and discover YOUR destiny! 

Until next time, keep smiling and keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

 

How to Resist the Lure of Temptation

Temptation. It comes in many forms but do we recognize it in the moment? Is it a sin to be tempted? Is it a sin to give in to it? Who really tempts us and why? Since we are in the season of Lent, I have been pondering these questions and perhaps you are too. 

What is temptation? 

The dictionary says it is "the desire to do something, particularly something wrong or unwise". I think of synonyms such as testing and trying. In my mind, this could apply to a lot of things. Who or what tries my patience? Who or what tests me? What do I do that is wrong or unwise? 

The Lord's prayer says "Lead me not into temptation." Jesus knew the lure of temptation. Remember what he went through with the devil in the desert during those 40 days of fasting. Whew. I have trouble fasting for more than a few hours. 

Have you heard the acronym "HALT"? Don't let yourself get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired because that is when we fall into temptation.

I feel like I am tempted everyday - by my bad habits, by family members, by my desires, by loneliness. Jesus knew all about these, that is why he told us to pray not to be led astray by temptation. We are tempted when we are with others and when we are by ourselves. It is a constant battle within. 

Temptation comes in many forms. 

Food, alcohol, chocolate, chips, pizza. They appeal to our appetite but what is our appetite for exactly? Is it really for food or for something else such as a comfort for loneliness, anger, frustration, etc? When tempted with turning stones into bread to satiate his hunger, Jesus answered "Man does not live by bread alone, but by the very word of God." (Matt 4:4) In other words, we often turn to externals such as food, alcohol, sugar, and shopping to satisfy, satiate, and comfort us when really we should turn inward and apply God's word to comfort and console ourselves. 

The temptation to glorify ourselves. 

The devil tried to entice Jesus to throw himself down from the pinnacle off the temple and call on the angels to rescue him. We are not to tempt God. Many people have claimed "God will protect me" as their reason for not getting the Covid vaccine or going to the doctor or getting that test done. To me this seems like putting God to the test rather than taking personal responsibility. 

There are other ways we try to glorify ourselves. Having to have the last word. Not admitting fault. Trying to outshine others by our travels, our intelligence, or our knowledge. We want all the credit, the acclaim, the recognition, to be a big whig and to look good in front of others. None of us want to look bad. Ever. We don't like to take responsibility for our faults and weaknesses. We don't like to admit we made a mistake or said something hurtful. We like to blame, shame, and judge others to make ourselves feel better. But, does it really? Or do we feel worse? 

We think we achieve great things and material wealth all on our own accord, but it is God who gives us the talents, the abilities, and the opportunities to achieve these things and so the glory belongs to him alone. Remember the story of Daedelus who flew too close to the sun. 

The lure of wealth, power, fame, beauty, youth and status. 

People want to be popular, admired, accepted, well-known, "in the cool crowd". Remember the high school cliques? They made you feel excluded and less than.  Many people thrive on adulation as evidenced by all the buzz on social media, but as we see in Jesus' case, the crowd's opinion is fickle and can change on a dime. 

Don't we know how well known we are in the eyes of God? I think we sometimes lose track of that fact. How much he loves us - no - adores us, despite our flaws, our faults and our failures. God knew us even before we were born. "Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you." (Jer 1:5).  We are uniquely and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). In fact, God calls us a "masterpiece" (Ephesians 2:10). Nothing here on earth can even come close to that kind of love and recognition. 

We often look to others for approval and acceptance, when it doesn't matter what other people think of us - at all. God sent Jesus to this earth to die to cleanse us from all unrighteousness so that we can have full access to the throne of grace, because only blood can cleanse us of sin. When we accept Christ as Lord, we are found righteous, approved and accepted. Our sins are forgiven. Case closed. 

It's all about the Ego 
The bottom line is temptation comes from our flesh aka our ego aka the devil. We look to the wrong things to comfort us, to give us a sense of worthiness, and to make us feel good about ourselves when really Christ is the answer to all our identity problems.

When we come to truly know who we are in Christ, we don't succumb to the temptations of the flesh as much or as often. We are more willing to accept the will and sovereignty of God and to acknowledge our humanity and the humanity of others. 

For Reflection
This Lenten season, let us each ponder the ways in which we are tempted and why. We all have our weaknesses and our sensitivities. Let us humble ourselves before the cross instead of judging because "There but for the grace of God go I". Let us pray for God's grace and mercy and extend that grace and mercy to others. 

I hope this post has given you food for thought as we prepare our hearts during this holy week. If you'd like more positive and practical advice, enter your email address in the box provided. You'll receive my weekly posts plus a copy of my newest ebook entitled "How to Develop a Spiritual Practice". It's a short read to help you grow by practicing spiritual habits such as journaling, prayer, meditation. I welcome your feedback on it. 

Stay tuned for more on healing, wholeness, health and harmony so YOU can ignite the power within and discover YOUR destiny!

In the meantime, 

Keep looking up!


Ariel Paz