On Becoming More Successful Every Day

Success is a goal most of us strive towards; success in our businesses, in our relationships, and in our personal lives. We often focus so much on the external things we need to do to be successful, we neglect the basic daily practices that are foundational to becoming truly successful at life. 

At the end of the day, when your head hits the pillow, do you make time to reflect and evaluate how it went? Many of us mark the day as a success if we have checked off everything on our to do list.  There was a time when I was like this too. My then husband used to tell me to "Just put less on your list". Yeah right and I was a working mom with two kids, a husband, a house, and a career to take care of. Do less - right. 

Since those days, I've learned that the to-do list is not what really matters most because we will always have a to-do list no matter what stage of life we are in. We can't sleep at night because there are so many things on our minds, so we drop off to sleep listening to the television, reading a book, or playing a video game and start tomorrow without gleaning the nuggets of wisdom from today.

If we want to grow, move forward, and be the healthiest, most loving person we can be, it is imperative that we take time to reflect every day. Was I calm or anxious? Happy or depressed? Kind or rude? Patient or short-tempered? Did I take time to be a blessing to someone? Was I angry at the grocery store or on the road? How did I speak to my spouse? My kids? And even more telling how did I talk to the customer service rep on the phone?

If we want to increase our personal power and move forward into our destiny, it is important to make time to reflect on our day every day. If we don't we will stay stuck, repeating the same patterns over and over and, as I like to say "Keep repeating the class." 

Many go through life on auto-pilot rushing and reacting. It is easy to do in the fear-based fast-paced culture we live in. We are in such a hurry to get more and more done, yet this stress-ridden lifestyle can kill us. Perhaps the slowing down forced on us by Covid is not such a bad thing. Perhaps it is an opportunity to  figure out what really matters in life at this juncture. 

We were not made to live under constant stress. We put unnecessary pressure on ourselves for what? We only have one life and if we don't enjoy it on a daily basis, what is the point? On my tombstone, I don't want it to read "She got a lot done." 

Personal Story 

A new neighbor I tried to befriend a few years ago, said to me recently as a sort of apology for cancelling on our get togethers several times, "Most people are unaware".

At first, I thought, no, people know exactly what they're doing. But the more I watch the actions of others, the more I realize, yes, some people are so busy rushing they are unaware. 

Another example recently, I brought up the cancelling issue to another long-time friend of mine, and she too, claimed unawareness. I try not to take these things personally, but after repeated occurences you have to wonder how much these people value the friendship so I just let them go. You can't make people change, you can only change yourself and I am all about getting rid of stressors. 

Many people are unaware not only of themselves, their motives, but also how their decisions, words and actions impact other people.  I'm just as guilty at times. Yet, we cannot absolve ourselves by saying we were unaware. If we want to move forward in life, we must take responsibility for ourselves and this starts by slowing down and paying attention to our words and our actions.

We are all in the process of becoming. 

Some of us work at it a bit more consciously than others but we all mess up at times. The key is to notice when we mess up, make time to understand what happened, and make changes to do better next time. This is part of developing our personal power, healing, and becoming whole.

Here are a few questions I ask myself at the end of my day and sometimes in the middle of the day when something goes awry:

- What went wrong?
- Was I fully present or was I on auto-pilot?
- Was I kind? Loving? Gentle? Patient? Joyful?
- What were my motives?
- Was I generous enough?
- Did I laugh?
- Did I serve?
- Was I a blessing?
-Did I stay connected to myself?
-Was I present?

- What frustrated me? What did I do about it? 

If we want to be better tomorrow than we are today, if we want to have more healing, wholeness and harmony in our lives, it starts with igniting the power within. And this starts by becoming more aware of ourselves every moment of the day.

We are here to grow, to love, and to shine our lights to help others do the same. At the same time, we need to work on removing the darkness in our own selves. This takes courage, effort and the grace of God. Let's not be too hard on ourselves, but let's do be more aware.

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Stay tuned for more practical and spiritual wisdom to help you develop your personal power and live the life of your dreams!

Until next time, keep looking up!

Ariel Paz