Breaking the Impulse Habit

It's a new year and most of us have areas we'd like to grow in. Perhaps we want to get a better handle on our finances or our diets, finally start an exercise routine, or like me, make meditation a part of your day. These are all habits. Habits, as you know, can be good or bad. They can move us forward into our destiny and they can keep us from moving forward as well.

The key to becoming all you want to be is creating good, healthy, habits and unlearning bad, unhealthy ones. Today's post is on a simple but powerful chain of events we all go through many times a day and how to use this process to develop better behavior patterns that move us forward into the life we dream of and deserve!

It all starts in our minds.
We each have more than 60,000 thoughts a day which include thoughts, memories, and feelings. These are sensory inputs into our behavior and actions. These sensory inputs are evaluated - appraised - by our consciousness. This is why mindfulness practice is so important. In order to take control of our habits and behaviors, we must first take control of the sensory inputs that are causing them. This is what mindfulness is all about.

The appraisal process. 
Whenever a thought, memory, feeling, or emotion rises up, our conscious (or perhaps not so conscious mind) evaluates it as either pleasant, unpleasant, or neutral. Each of our 60,000+ thoughts are evaluated instanteously and then what happens? We react, don't we?

The reaction. 
Reacting is usually not the proper thing to do in normal situations. We want to live a conscious life, meaning we make conscious choices including what to do about our thoughts, emotions, and feelings. They can control us and make us do or say things we will soon regret. How many times have we lost our temper because we misinterpreted what someone said and blasted a loved one? How many times have we reached for that sweet to calm our stress or heartache? These are examples of reactions and not conscious choice.

With every appraisal, our minds react with either aversion, craving, or neutrality. Depending on our level of conscious awareness, we will be manipulated by these stimuli. I don't know about you, but that is not how I want to live. I have also noticed that stress and high emotion, hijack our consciousness. We regress to child-like behavior which is never a good thing. So what comes next?

The action. 
After we have appraised the stimulus as either pleasant or unpleasant, and reacted with either a desire or a disdain for whatever it is, we proceed to the third link in this chain of events - we take action. So here's an example, I feel pain in my hip - unpleasant. I don't like pain - aversion arises. I take action; I get up from my chair, I stretch, I complain. Or here's another example. A loved one says something. I evaluate it from my own perceptions and history. This evaluation may or may not be correct. I interpret what they say as negative - aversion. Next I take action. I can either question what they mean (healthy) or I can yell at them (unhealthy). These are just two examples of this powerful Appraisal - Impulse - Action chain that we must take control of if we want to be more in control of our own lives.

What area of life would you like more control of? It's a new year so it is a perfect time to make change. Start with something small - like maybe not replying as quickly when someone says something. Most of us are too quick to answer and don't give enough thought before we do. Write and let me know how it goes for you. We can all learn from each other, yes?

If you enjoyed this post and found it helpful, consider joining our community.  For more on helping us all find healing, wholeness and harmony and discovering our destiny, enter your email in the box provided. You'll receive my bi-weekly posts as well as a copy of my free eguide, "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path". 

Stay tuned for more on this, and until next time,

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

Why Your Daily Choices are So Important

We all make lots of choices every day. Some are concious and others are from sheer habit. Some of them are minor like what shirt or tie to wear or where to have lunch. Other choices are much more important and in fact, some determine our destiny, like what career path we pursue, if we choose to marry and who, who we hang around with, and what actions we will take. In reality, our lives as well as our destinies are made up of the many decisions we make every day.

Think about it for a moment. Choices about what to eat, what to buy, whether to exercise or plop ourselves in front of the boob tube over time, all become habits - some good, some bad. These habits will either benefit us or harm us in the long run and by then, it will be too late.

Daily choices of a donut over a piece of fruit,  a workout or a boob tube session, a choice to be kind or to be rude, a choice to stay addicted or to get healthy, a choice to choose peace or to allow drama and strife. Our choices determine our lives and our destinies.

The same principle applies to our thoughts and beliefs.
We can choose positive uplifting and hope-filled thoughts. Or we can choose negative, depressing, and discouraging thoughts. We can choose to see the silver lining of every difficult situation or we can allow our peace and joy to be stolen by the inevitable challenges of life.

This same principle applies to our spiritual beliefs.
Spirituality is a crucial component of our lives. We are spiritual beings living in a physical body. Ignoring our spiritual self is like ignoring our need to eat or sleep. We are body, mind, and spirit and all three components need to be attended to.

We can choose to have faith in God or not. We can choose to have faith in ourselves or not. And we can choose to have faith in others, or not. The daily choices we make in this area will strongly impact who and what we will become and whether our not we will achieve our destiny. Our choices also impact who and what others become.

So today, I ask you this question: will you choose faith? Will you choose to believe in God, yourself and your loved ones? As the Bible says "Faith is the belief in things not yet seen". Because, after all, if we could see it, it wouldn't be faith at all now would it?

I hope this post was encouraging. If you enjoyed it, enter your email address in the box provided to join our community and receive my bi-weekly posts. You'll also receive a copy of my free eguide "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path". 

Until next time, choose to believe in yourself, in others, and in God and as always,

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

Ignite the Power Within Step 2: How to Make Better Choices

Life is all about choices, isn't it? Every day we make dozens of choices, some conscious and some not. We make a choice about what time to get up in the morning. What to have for breakfast. What to wear to work. Some choices are automatic and others we have to think about. The great news is we can make new and different choices each and every day. You can transform your life by changing the choices you make and it all starts with changing how you think.

Now this concept is not new. In fact, 2000 or so years ago, the Apostle Paul encouraged us to "Be transformed daily by the renewing of our minds" (Romans 12:2). What we read, watch, listen to and who we hang around all program our minds without us realizing it. Funny story.

Years ago, when I worked for the state government, there was a lovely coworker who had the habit of making a "Tsk tsk" kind of sound with her mouth. Believe it or not, after several months of being around her, I, too, started making this same sound. People influence us. Television influences us. Magazines and photos are a strong influence. Music influences us. We have to be mindful of what is influencing our minds.

Our thoughts are extremely powerful.We have the ability to change our lives by simply changing our thoughts.  They can motivate and encourage us or they can cause us to be depressed and down. Norman Vincent Peale said when we change our thoughts, we change our world. What we think about and dwell on, is eventually what will manifest itself in our lives.

Just because an ad on television features a mouth-watering pizza or cheeseburger, doesn't mean we have to pick up the phone and order a delivery. Just because someone brings in donuts at the office or has a candy dish on their desk, does not mean we have to indulge. It's not only outside messages we have to watch out for, we also need to be aware of the messages we are sending ourselves.

For example, instead of saying to yourself, "I'm too lazy to exercise" start reprogramming your mind by saying "I am self-controlled and disciplined.  I will exercise today because I value my health and my body and I want to keep it in good shape." Instead of saying "I don't have any will power ," say "I am powerful and I can control what I eat, drink, say, think etc". Our beliefs impact our thoughts which in turn impact our actions. You are more powerful than you realize. Give yourself more credit.

You have the ability to recreate yourself every day. Reality starts in our minds every morning when we get up. Many years ago, I memorized a verse of scripture to start my day off on a positive note:

"This is the day the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it." (Ps. 118: 24).

No matter whether the sun is out or not, how well I slept the night before, or what I need to deal with that day,  I make a conscious decision to put on an attitude of gratitude and joy.  Our day will go better when we set a positive tone first thing in the morning.

Step 2 to Igniting the Power Within asks us to take control of our thoughts. We are to think on things that are true, noble, and of good report. In other words, focus on the positive. Dwelling on negative thoughts like what someone said or did to us or a mistake we made, keeps us stuck in yesterday, drains our energy from today, and leads us into a downward spiral of inertia that sidetracks us from our destiny.

Here's an exercise to help you gain more control of your thoughts. For 5 or 10 minutes a day, stop and observe what you are thinking about. If you can sit down and close your eyes all the better. You may be surprised where your mind has wandered. Then take a few minutes to totally clear your mind of any thoughts. Pay attention to your breath.  Lastly, replace any negative thoughts with good, positive, energizing thoughts. Give it a try and see how much better you feel!

If you enjoyed this post and would like to join our community, enter your email address in the box provided. In addition to my bi-weekly posts, you'll also recieve a copy of my free e-guide entitled "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path".

Until next time, stay tuned for more on igniting the power within and discovering your destiny!

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz

When the Going Gets Tough

March is upon us. It seems the weather can't seem to make up its mind. One day it is blustery and cold and the next it feels like spring. Changing from one season to another seems to be difficult even for mother nature and for we human beings, seasons of change and transition can be even more challenging. But not to fret. Just as the blossoms of spring are sure to bloom, so too, we will blossom and bloom when the time is right.

Ever feel like God is calling you to something new but you don't know what? Perhaps you've lost your passion for things that used to motivate you or don't know what season you are in right now, but I can tell you this. When things get uncomfortable and stuff starts happening, you can be sure something is up, but it is not the time to throw in the towel.

Someone said to me recently "You are used to toughing things out" and I realized that is true. I have been. As a single parent, working a demanding career, and not having family support around, it has been quite tough. But there are times in life when we need to tough it out, regardless of what others think or say. What really only matters is what God thinks and says. What matters is doing the right thing no matter how hard or inconvenient it may be.

So let's put this into more practical terms. Are you in a difficult marriage or relationship? Tough it out. Are you struggling with health issues, financial issues, or house problems? Tough it out. Are your kids doing the wrong thing even though you've taught them otherwise? Tough it out.

Too many times we throw in the towel because the going gets rough. Too many people get a divorce, quit their job, or disown their kids because things aren't going the way they would like them to go. Guess what? That's life. Life is not always a bed of roses. Things don't always go according to our plans and schedules. Sometimes people make poor choices that affect us. As a friend used to tell me, "It is what it is." So, what to do in these seasons of challenge when the whirlwinds swirl all around us?

Two words. Have faith. As I say in my book, faith is the power behind the promises, the fuel that fires up our engine. We all have it to some degree because it is a gift from God. The question is are we going to activate it? There are things we can do to strengthen our spiritual muscle to get thru the tough seasons of life. For more, check out my newly revised edition on Amazon.com or your favorite online retailer and in the meantime, keep looking up!
http://www.amazon.com/The-Power-Faith-journey-wholeness-ebook/dp/B007P90GDU/ref=sr_1_cc_1?s=aps&ie=UTF8&qid=1395253800&sr=1-1-catcorr&keywords=the+power+of+faith+ariel+paz

Ariel Paz 

Are You Happy Now?

"I will be happy when the kids grow up." "I will be happy when I lose 10 pounds." "I will be happy when I retire." "I will be happy when I find a partner." "I will be happy when I earn x$".

Ever hear yourself saying something like this? We are expecting some external circumstance to make us happy. The truth of the matter is that we really don't need ANYTHING to make us happy. Happiness is a mental state of mind that we CHOOSE. As long as we structure our lives on something we cannot control, we will experience pain and unhappiness.

Things will never be totally perfect in our lives. There will always be some area, some relationship, some problem that needs attention. The key, I think, is to not dwell on what is wrong with my life, but what is good in it. Today I went for a walk, took a dip in the pool, and had a nice lunch. These simple pleasures give me great happiness and I am thankful for them all.

Abraham Lincoln once said " People are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." Life is too short. Today, will you make a choice to be happy?