7 Ways to Feel Less Lonely

Are you feeling lonely today? Many, including myself, are single, divorced, or widowed and looking for someone or something to fill that void in their spirit. Hollywood would have us to believe the romantic Tom Cruise line "You complete me."

The truth is no human being can complete us. Relationships can only do so much: a spouse, a child, a parent - these are are practice grounds where we learn to love but they are imperfect at best. People will always let us down. They were never meant to be a substitute for a relationship with God. When I was married,  I remember feeling ever so lonely  because there was no connection, no intimacy, and no relationship with God. Perhaps you feel this way today.

Only God can fill the hole in our hearts because he is the one who put it there. We were made to desire a relationship with God, but so many of us turn away seeking solace in people and things that will never satisfy. Today's post is about developing a connection to God, your higher power, or whatever name you feel comfortable with so that you will feel less lonely and more connected to the Creator of the Universe.

Do you "believe" in God, but have no idea how to connect with him?
Do you often crave the presence of another human being?
Do you feel incomplete when you're not in a relationship?

If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, today's post will help you feel the presence of God and fill that void inside you. God does not want you feeling lonely. That's why he promised "I will never leave you, nor forsake you."

It is possible to have relationship with God, in some of the very same ways we have a relationship with another human being. The difference is God is so much more reliable, faithful, trustworthy and loves us more than any human being ever could. So today we'll talk about 7 ways to relieve the feeling of loneliness by learning to enjoy the presence of God.

1. Practice Gratitude
    Do you focus more on what's lacking in your life or what's present? Just like Eve who had everything she needed in the Garden of Eden, she focused on the one thing that she couldn't have. It's human nature. But this thinking keeps us miserable. When we pay more attention to the blessings we all have, we will feel more joyful and less depressed.

2. Practice Joy
    How does one practice joy?  I have other posts on that topic so you can do a search. Joy is an inner delight. It comes from knowing God loves and cares for you and that everything that happens to you is under his watchful eye. It is a knowing that no matter how tough things might seem, they will work out for your good. Joy is a mindset that brings us into the presence of God.

3. Journal
    Now I don't know exactly how this one works, but I do know it works. When we get quiet, and put our thoughts down on paper, God can speak to us. Journaling helps us to get clear on our thoughts and feelings. It is that still small voice that reveals truth and gives answers. We gain clarity about problems we are facing. I have been journalling for over 20 years and I have a stack of journals I'm debating what to do with.

4. Spend quiet time alone
    This is key. You know how hard it is to hear your significant other when you're in a noisy restaurant? Well, God speaks to us in an inaudible whisper. We can't hear his voice if we have the radio or television on all the time. We need to turn all the electronics off and just be. God will show up, promise.

5. Read a sacred text
   This is a discipline that pays off dearly. Just this week, I almost started my day without going to my Bible reading. Boy was I glad I did. The words jumped off the page at me. This is God's Spirit speaking to us. It's like He is saying "This is for YOU!" But we won't be able to hear from God, if we don't tune into his word.

6. Talk to God
    Think of your best friend. How often do you talk to him or her? Now how would you like to have that kind of relationship with God? You can. But unlike your friend, God is never too busy or to preoccupied to listen to us. I talk to God throughout the day most days. Just like any relationship it takes time to develop. Another way we talk to God is through prayer. The Bible says "Pray unceasingly. I think what that means is what I just shared - talk to God during your day.

7. Meditate
    Meditation is a hot topic these days. However, there is more to meditation than sitting still, closing our eyes, and watching our thoughts float  by. Christian meditation refers to meditating on the Word of God. Take a passage or a phrase of Scripture and think about it, reflect on its meaning. Ask how it applies to you. This is how we absorb the truths that will help us to overcome the negative chatter that pervades our thinking.

When you start to practice these 7 steps, I promise you, you will feel less lonely and more connected. You will start seeing amazing things and you will know God is with you and cares for you. It could be an unxpected gift in the mail. A special delivery. A license plate. You never know where God is going to show up. But He promises that when we seek him, we will find him.

If you enjoyed this post and would like to join our community, enter your email address in the box provided. You'll receive my bi-weekly posts plus a copy of my free e-guide "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path".

Stay tuned for more practical and spiritual wisdom to help you ignite the power within and discover YOUR destiny!

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz


   

How to Have More Ease in Life

Life can be exhausting.  Just the daily tasks of going to work, taking care of the home, the car, the kids, trying to eat healthy and stay in shape, manage the finances. The list goes on and on. As a single mom, I was always busy: working, going to night school, taking care of the kids, the house, trying to keep in shape. I was disciplined, structured, and organized. I was also exhausted a lot of the time.  Raising two boys without a dad is no picnic.  Life doesn't have to be like this and today I'm going to share what I've learned about how to have more ease in life, despite our circumstances.

You see, when we learn to live a fast-paced, over-committed life, it is hard to slow down. We adapt certain behaviors and ways of living to cope with the challenges of life that becomes our norm. Today let's talk about 5 ways we can bring more ease into our lives.

Side story. Do you ever get a song or a verse that just sticks in your spirit over and over? I do. I keep getting this one passage year after year and I asked why God keeps giving it to me. Then I figured it out. It's because I hadn't learned all the lessons that were in it! You may be familiar with the passage Matthew 11: 28-30.  So here's what it taught me.

1. "Come to me"
Jesus knows when we are tired and worn out by all our responsibilities and to-dos. He invites us to draw closer to him. In other words, to spend time in prayer, time reading the Word, time just being still. This invitation is extended to each of us who feel overwhelmed.

2. "...all you who are weary and heavy burdened"
When we feel weary and heavy burdened, this is a sign we have taken on too much. It's time to let go of some of our commitments. It is time to rest. Our bodies and our minds need rest. Our minds cannot rest when we engage in too much activity and have too many concerns to deal with.

3. "and I will give you rest". 
This is a promise. When we let go of some of the extraneous activities and commitments we have taken on, when we turn our cares and concerns over to God, then we can enjoy mental and physical rest. We were not made to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders. That is God's job.

4.  "Take my yoke and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart"
Jesus is God's example of how we are supposed to be: gentle and humble. I know I was not born gentle or humble. In fact, gentleness is a fruit of the Spirit. Like a seed, gentleness needs to be cultivated in order to grow. We need to learn to be humble. Most of us want to take all the credit and be the center of attention to feel good about ourselves. Jesus was not like that. Jesus was a servant and that is what we need to be: servants and examples of God's love, mercy, grace and compassion.

5. "For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." 
Yes, life has its challenges and its responsibilities, but we are not to let them weigh us down and steal our peace and our joy. A friend of mine once suggested I start declaring "Today is going to be an easy day". I tried it and it worked! Jesus does not want us to feel over-burdened. We are instructed to cast all our worries and concerns on him. (1 Peter 5:7).  He is our burden-bearer. When we let go of some activities, we have more time to have fun and to laugh and we all know the adage "Laughter is the best medicine!"

If we want to have more ease in our lives, we need to let go of some activities, some people, and spend more time with Jesus. It is important to rest, have fun, and laugh.

I hope this post has been helpful. Do consider joining our community by entering your email address in the box provided. You'll receive my practical and positive bi-weekly posts plus a copy of my free eguide "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path". 

Stay tuned for more on how to ignite the power within and discover YOUR destiny!

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

The One Thing You Need to Achieve Your Goals

Can't seem to lose the weight? Make time to exercise? Find yourself snacking on junk food and watching television instead of doing something of value? You're not alone. Although we know these things are good for us and important in the big scheme of things, somehow we find an excuse and manage to avoid doing the very things that matter. Why is that?

It comes down to the issue of self-mastery. Self-mastery means being able to regulate one's choices, behaviors, words, thoughts, and feelings. Another word for self-mastery is self-discipline. Although the word discipline somehow has gotten a bad rap and often conjures up images of Catholic nuns smacking you with a ruler, self-discipline is critical to our moving forward in life.

We need a change of perspective on the word discipline. How about we replace the word "discipline" with the word "mastery". Self-mastery. Doesn't that have a better ring to it? Think of it as a tool in your arsenal to help you achieve your goals in life: get in shape, get your financial house in order, enjoy an exercise routine, develop a spiritual practice.

We need discipline in many areas of life: at work, at home, in public, and with ourselves. I hear people say all the time things like: "I am so undisciplined" or "I am so lazy". Stop saying things like that because our words become a self-fulfilling prophesy. I'm willing to bet you are holding down a steady job of some sort. If so, you have already developed discipline. You get up everyday to go to work. You get up, get dressed, and endure a possibly grueling commute to get to work on time. This all takes discipline. Not everybody can manage to do that. Give yourself a pat on the back. Now think about this.

If you have mastery in one area of your life, it means you have already developed the skill to some extent. Now all you need to do is to apply the skill of mastery to another area of your life. For example, I have some friends who are constantly trying to lose weight. Weight loss is no easy feat. I know because I used to be several pounds overweight myself and I still battle the bulge. They tell me they are going to start a diet, an exercise program, join Weight Watchers, etc. They ask me to hold them accountable. Then what happens? Nothing. After a few weeks, I bravely get up the courage to ask how the diet is going and then I hear something to this effect: "I just can't seem to stick to it" or "I don't have time to get to the gym", basically, an excuse.

The real reason they are not able to lose the weight is a matter of not applying the skill of discipline in this area. Weight loss is another opportunity to practice discipline. Or to put it another way, how we spend our time and energy. Motivational speaker and author, Jim Rohn, says this: "Spend most of your time on the 80% of things that matter". The problem is many people spend 80% of their time on things of little value, like Happy Hour, and only 20% of their time on what truly matters.

The same thought processes you use to get yourself to go to work everyday can be applied to any goal. How do you get yourself to work? Do you say "I'm too busy" or "I can't get up in time"? No, we make ourselves do it because we want the paycheck. In the same way, if we really and truly want to be thinner, we will make ourselves do the necessary steps. For example, a goal might be: lose 5 pounds by Easter. The action steps might be 1) walk briskly for 30 minutes 3 - 4 times a week and 2) cut back on portion sizes. These are realistic and achievable for anyone. Any goal can be broken down into simple yet doable steps, IF you're interested.

Today is the day to pick an area of your life where you want to see transformation and change. Establish a realistic and reasonable time-oriented goal and then create a short list of action items. Post this list somewhere you will see it every day. Writing down our goals and having them in front of us keeps us focused. See my post on setting SMART goals.

Now that we have discussed the practical side of discipline, let's talk about the spiritual component.

We need to have faith in ourselves that we CAN achieve our goals and dreams. I think a major reason people fail to change is that they lack the faith in themselves to accomplish their goals. Faith is the fuel that fires up our engines. Without faith, we will achieve nothing. If we say to ourselves "I'll never lose this weight" or "I'll never get out of debt" again we are setting ourselves up for failure. We must believe we have the power and the discipline to make the changes we want to see in our lives. How else are we going to live "the abundant life"?

So, what one area of your life do you want to change? Next, define 3 - 5 action steps you can take to make progress on this goal. Above all, reprogram your thinking. Start telling yourself "I can ......". One of my favorite verses says "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Phil 4:13). As a Christian, if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we have the power within us to move mountains, not just lose those 5 pounds.

Until next time, I hope this post has inspired and motivated you to make that change. You CAN do it! Write me and let me know how it's going.

If you'd like to join our community and receive a copy of my free e-guide entitled "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path" enter your email in the box provided. You'll  receive my encouraging bi-weekly posts in your inboxand.

Stay tuned for more positive and practical wisdom to help you ignite the power within and discover YOUR destiny!

In the meantime,
Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz

Ignite the Power Within Step 4: How to Win in the Game of Life

Baseball season is upon us and Baltimore is  once again full of hopeful excitement. Loyal Orioles fans pack the stadium sporting their orange and white jerseys, ready to watch the game and socialize with friends and loved ones. Kids hug their blue cotton candy and the smell of hotdogs activates our taste buds.

Imagine a runner rounding the bases at full speed. Excitement mounts as he heads toward home base. Sensing the urgency of the moment, he makes a courageous dive towards the plate, the fans hold their breath and then the umpire signals "You're out!"

As I watched the game this past weekend, I was reminded that life is like baseball in more ways than one. Sometimes life throws us a curve ball. Other times we strike out a time or two.  It could be a broken relationship, the death of a loved one, an unresolved health issue, or a financial setback. It could even be a grand slam of all of the above. What to do then?

At such times, it is imperative that we pull out the secret weapon we all have deep within.  I call it the power of Faith: an amazing gift we each have been given to help us cope with the curve balls of life. Some of us, for whatever reason, get thrown more curves than others, but we must trust that a power greater than ourselves has a plan and a purpose for each time we strike out.

When we realize we have this great gift, despite the odds and our circumstances, Faith gives us the ability to stay in the game. Yes, it takes courage and yes, it takes strength but when we activate our faith during the tough times of life, God gives us both of these. He equips and empowers us to do what we need to do even when the game seems all but lost.

Just as we need to strengthen our physical muscles to handle the demands of life we also need to strengthen our spiritual muscle. As I share in my book, "The Power of Faith", there are specific steps you can take to develop your personal power so you will be equipped when life throws you a curve ball.

So, next time you feel like you've struck out once again, remember every play can teach us something about ourselves, others, life, and God. If you enjoyed this post, join our community and  enter your email in the box provided. You'll also recieve my free e-guide entitled "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path".

Until next time, stay in the game and keep your eye on the ball. You're bound to hit a home run sooner or later!

Ariel Paz 

How to Walk in Abundance - Part 3

We've been talking about receiving the promises of God. What are they though? Joy, Peace, Abundance, Provision, Guidance, Wisdom, Love, Strength, Prosperity, Health to name a few. First, we talked about expecting God's best in our lives. Then we talked about the power of speaking out God's word and what you want to see show up in your life. Today we will finish up this series with the third step to walking in abundance. 

The first two steps set and energize our desires and call in God's help and power. These are crucial to seeing the life we dream of materialize but there is one more step which is just as powerful.

In order to see our dreams materialize, we need to take disciplined action. In other words, we need to develop habits that move us toward our goal. We cannot keep making excuses for why we are where we are in life. We have to DO something about it if we are unhappy.

Here's a personal story. While raising my two sons as a single mom, we lived in an aging townhome. The place always needed fixing up, repairs, and replacing things like the windows and the carpet. I'd get home from work, take care of the boys, and then start working on whatever the current house project was. I remember pulling up old carpet and tack nails in my living room, on my hands and knees. I remember painting the wood paneling in the basement to give it a fresh look. I remember painting the stairway and hall and ripping down awful wallpaper scrap by scrap.

My mom always wondered why I kept "putting all that money into that house". Well, because when one owns a home, one has a responsibility to maintain it, that's why. One day, while painting the dining room, I heard God speak to me "Go see the condo". I had seen an ad for a condominium complex in the newspaper recently. I put the paint brush down and decided to go visit. Long story short, it turned out to be the home of my dreams. God gave me a huge new kitchen, a luxurious bathroom with a lovely garden tub for soaking, and a built-in fireplace. I sold the family home for a good price because it was in pristine condition to a young man starting off on his own. I never looked back.

I share this story to illustrate the fact that when we do our part, God will do his part in his timing, and often, his timing is unexpected. What dream do you want to see come true? What steps are you taking to make it happen? The promises of God are a team effort.

I hope this series was encouraging and helpful. Consider joining our blog community and enter your email address in the box provided. You'll receive my bi-weekly emails to encourage and inspire you to ignite the power within and discover your destiny! You'll also receive a copy of my free eguide "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path" for you or a friend who is seeking.

Until next time, stay tuned for more positive and practical wisdom.

Keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

How to Receive the Promises of God - Part 2

What is it you would like to see show up in your life? A spouse? A child? A new job? How would you like to show up today? More peaceful? Patient? Less frustrated? More joyful?

Last time, we talked about our expectations. What we expect in life is what becomes our reality. If we want good things to show up, we need to change our thinking to expect that they will show up in the right way and in the right time. Today, I am going to share the second key to receiving the promises of God.

As a single mom raising two teenage sons, life was quite a challenge. I had to deal with rebellion, addictions, cutting school, the police, expulsion, DUIs, alcohol, smoking... well, you get the idea. Through it all, I was a praying mom. Isn't it interesting how we don't usually call on God till we get in a pickle?

Now you know I am a firm believer in the power of prayer, but let's not stop there. There is one more weapon in our arsenal against things that try to come against us and that is OUR VOICE. First, we need to become comfortable with praying out loud. That's right. Not the meek quiet whisper some of us are used to. We need to speak out boldly and confidently. Here's a story that happened just today.

My sister and I were on the phone with the real estate agent who is trying to sell my mom's house. Let's just say there has been a tremendous amount of strife the past year between my mom and my sister. After not being around each other for forty years, living together is quite the adjustment. After going through all the different issues, sans Mom, who decided she was not participating, the real estate agent launches into prayer - not some lengthy, preachy-type prayer, but prayer just the same. I was like "Now, why haven't I thought of that?" She closed "In Jesus' name, amen." Poof! Powerful! The change in the atmosphere was palpable.

That's what I'm talking about using our voice. When we declare God's word out loud, God's ears perk up. All of heaven comes to attention (Rev 8:1-4).There is power in the Word of God. Instead of the usual "I'll never lose this weight" how about "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Phil 4:13). Instead of "I'm so tired, I don't know how I'll get through this day" try "The joy of the Lord is my strength" (Neh 8:10). Instead of "I'll never break this addiction" declare "Who the Son sets free is free indeed," (John 8:36).

Not only will our thinking be transformed, our faith will be strengthened and God will come to our assistance and work the supernatural. Give it a try and see what happens. You will be amazed AND transformed.

Now you know the first two keys to receiving God's promises. Stay tuned for next time when we'll discuss the third and final key.

If this post was helpful, consider joining our community. Enter your email address in the box provided. You'll receive my bi-weekly posts and a copy of my free eguide "7 Steps to Finding Your Spiritual Path". 

Until next time, keep looking up!

Ariel Paz 

How to Walk in Abundance - Part 1

Everybody seems to be talking about abundance these days. It's natural to want to see more good things in our lives. What is it you want to see more of? More money? More fun? Better relationships? More peace? These are all good things and today we are going to talk about the 3 steps to help us see more of these in our lives.

As a single divorced mom, I lived from paycheck to paycheck. We went out to dinner only on occasion. My kids never had the latest and coolest clothes or toys. We lived in a older townhome and I drove my cars until they died. I was stressed, anxious, and pressured much of the time. Until....I found Jesus. Yup, Jesus was the key that unlocked the door to a better life: a life of joy, freedom, hope, and most importantly, a life of faith.

Today, some 20 years later, life is much different. I am more relaxed, have more confidence, and am blessed beyond belief in every area of my life. I have seen miracles in my health, my relationships, and my finances. They have all turned around. Perhaps you would like to see things turn around in your life. Well, today I am going to share with you the first of 3 key principles that can make that happen for you, too. I hope you are as excited as I am to learn them.

First, we must understand one thing : ALL GOOD THINGS COME FROM GOD. Not "the universe". God is the creator of the universe. Not from our own strength and skill, although we do have a part to play in seeing our dreams come true. Not from merely wishing for good things. Nope. Every blessing and every good thing in our lives ultimately comes from God. He is the Source. He gave us life. He gave us smarts. He gave us skills. He gave us our bodies and our brains.

Now that we have that straight, let's jump into the first step to receiving the promises of God.

Step #1: Start expecting good things. 

Many of us were brought up in a negative environment. Perhaps your parents lived through the Great Depression or the Holocaust. These events dramatically impacted the minds of people growing up in those years. Or there was a parent with an illness such as alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness. There are many circumstances that can cause us to have a negative mindset. Yet, we can change our thinking. If we want to see good things show up in our lives, we have to expect to see them show up. We have to realize we are children of God! We deserve good things to show up.

It's all about expectation. When we have low, just get by expectations, that is what we will receive. When we have better expectations, that is what we will receive too. Now I am talking about expectations for ourselves and from God, to be clear. We have to watch our expectations of others. When we have unrealistic expectations of others, we will often be let down.

Expectations have to do with the spiritual force called Hope. Without hope, we cannot set our expectations higher. Hope is a key ingredient to seeing our lives improve. Without it, we are doomed to settle in status quo and who wants that? We were meant to soar with wings like eagles.

For Reflection
So what have you been expecting recently? In what area of your life can you adjust your expectations? No matter what has happened in your past, today is a new day and you can change your tomorrow by changing your expectations.

If this post resonated with you, please consider signing up for my bi-weekly blog posts and becoming part of our community. You'll also receive my free e-guide "How to Develop a Spiritual Practice ". Simply enter your email address in the box provided. That's it!

Stay tuned for the next two keys to walking in abundance. You won't want to miss them!

Until next time, keep looking up!

Ariel Paz